1. My feet are quite amazing – I can pick almost anything up with my toes, write with them, undo buttons and even peel banana’s with them. If I suddenly lost both hands, I might not do to bad in life with my feet :D

2. My vagina is also quite amazing! I can queef the alphabet on command and even fill it up with water using my PC muscles and hit targets with deadly accuracy. No, I’m not kidding. I used to save my empty shampoo bottles and line them up along the edge of the bathtub for just this reason. Now, imagine what I can do to a penis!

3. I wear my sunglasses at all times. It doesn’t matter where or what time of the day it is. My sunglasses are a part of me. If I don’t have my sunglasses perched upon my head, my head feels naked. As I sit here at 4:20am typing this blog post, can you guess where my sunglasses are?! *sings* I WEAR MY SUNGLASSES AT NIGHT!

4. I have an intense (and totally irrational) fear of walking up and down stairs in the dark. I always get the overwhelming feeling that something of unimaginable horror is behind me and going to kill me, and I usually end up doing this weird sideways/backwards walk so that I can watch the front and back of me simultaneously. At the last step all I can think about is finding a light and nine times out of ten I break out into a run.

5. I have to go to bed with socks on, but can’t sleep with them on – I always kick them off about a half hour later (this is where 99% of my missing socks end up – in a mushed-up pile at the very end of the bed under the sheets).

6. When I’m in a car, I have to tap my feet to all the lines on the road. For example, if we pass a driveway, I tap my toes to each side of it (the opening) as we go past. If we drive over a dotted line I try to tap my toes as fast as I can inside my shoes to each dot. I realize this might not be such a great habit when I finally get my drivers license.

7. I constantly write with my fingers, in the air. If I’m not doing anything that requires the use of my hands (eating, watching tv, masturbating, riding in a car) I’m always drawing with my index finger. It might be writing a sentence, solving a math problem, tracing something I see close by, or drawing something – my fingers are always moving and I’m not even aware I’m doing it (people point it out to me all the time).